Health and Beauty

Showing 1–16 of 57 resultsSorted by popularity

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  “Except for the eye incident, Midnight has been a superb cat.”

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  This sure doesn’t look like Kansas…

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  Exercise

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  Emergency at the Midlife Crisis Center

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  “Hi, guy.”

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  “Would the gentleman care for a razor and comb to start?”

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  “Tonight–just for a change–let’s see if we can get through dinner without eating anything at all.”

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  Table for Two

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  “Hi. My name is Tanya and, if elected, my agenda will be cheddar! Cheddar, cheddar, cheddar!!”

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  “I’m sorry, you want Glutes–this is Pecs.”

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  Insomnia

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  My Corporate Sponsors

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  “We have adult teeth now, Debbie, and, as such, they demand adult pain.”

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  “I’m sorry, but I find myself less compelled by our little conversation and wondering, instead, how you’ve achieved your special effects.”

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  “I’m glad I rarely get to look at these magazines. I’d have to kill myself a lot more often.”

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  “In my workout this morning I hit a new personal best, but on a seasonally adjusted basis, my numbers actually fell.”

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